Last night I went to my friend's apartment for the evening sunset meal (iftar) for Ramadan. She is an American Muslim and is engaged to a Palestinian man. Their two mutual friends were there - another Palestinian guy and an American Catholic who is fasting with his friends for the entire month.
My friend had spent all day cooking: A baked whole chicken, roasted lamb with chickpeas, russet potatoes, green beans, basmati rice, watermelon, and a wonderful spinach salad. I brought some mocha brownies and ice cream for dessert, and there was also turtle cheesecake, almond cake, and white chocolate mocha trifle. Wow. I tried to rationalize my gluttony with, "I haven't eaten ALL DAY...!" Ha.
But I'm getting ahead of myself. We initially broke the fast at exactly 8:33 with dates and water. The evening was much more relaxed than the previous night at the mosque. In fact, after the dates and water we immediately filled our plates with the meal and didn't pray until the very last minute. I think we were actually a little late...
(There is a start time for each of the five prayers, and you have until the next prayer time to do that prayer. So 8:33 p.m. is when you can start the sundown prayer, and you have until around 10:00 p.m. to complete that prayer. At about 10:00 is another prayer, so you have until the next morning around 5:00 a.m. to do that one. Make sense?)
After the meal we talked, watched parts of movies and got seconds of dessert. Since my friend and I were the only women, I felt a little awkward hanging out with just the guys, so I convinced my friend to let me help her clean up!
She and I did the sundown prayer in her room together, and then the guys (except the Catholic) did theirs alone in her study room. Then, since we had run up into the 10:00 p.m. one, we all did that one together in the same room.
After the prayer we had some homemade spiced chai and talked until after midnight. The conversation was about what is and is not haram, or impermissible, in Islam. It was more of a philosophical debate, and it was very interesting. Some topics included dating and marrying non-Muslims and whether it matters whether it's a male or female who is the Muslim and whether smoking cigarettes and/or smoking hookah are okay (conclusion: Okay! We used the hookah pipe last night, haha!). Then the conversation moved to the subject of jin which are a separate creation from humans but are not demons - this topic got really creepy, and we merged it with stories about scary dreams we've had, and shadow people, yikes! We also talked about evolution, including mutations, adaptations, micro-evolution, and Judeo-Christian vs. Muslim beliefs on the subject. Whew!
Another reason I felt the iftar was really relaxed is because my friend wore a loose hijab. When women are with family and close friends, they don't have to be as strict as in public. She had a thin scarf draped over her head without pinning it, and it flowed beautifully around her face. I still kept mine pinned closely because I didn't want to mess with it, take out the pins, etc. Plus, I really didn't know these people that well. Honestly, I was not concerned with my appearance!
It was great to just hang out with young Muslims from all different backgrounds. I understand much better what it's like for them to be in America and to be misunderstood. When my friend hears someone say something awful like, "Muslims just need to go back to where they came from!" she can only laugh it off because she is FROM here. And the Palestinians? "If we had somewhere to go, we would be there."
Muslims are people just like you and me. They come from all different backgrounds. Even devout Muslims who pray five times per day and fast during the month of Ramadan live normal lives, hanging out with friends, watching movies, doing hookah, eating way too much dessert...
I'm glad I got to participate in both a proper iftar at the mosque, and a casual iftar at my friend's place. As for my two days of fasting, it really wasn't that big of a challenge, although it was fabulous to wake up this morning at a normal hour for breakfast :)
Showing posts with label feast. Show all posts
Showing posts with label feast. Show all posts
14 August 2011
13 August 2011
Ramadan: Day Two (?!)
On Friday night, my friend and I broke the fast and feasted at the mosque. An important element of Ramadan, however, is to invite close friends to do the same in one's own home. My friend is hosting tomorrow night, and she invited me to celebrate with her again.
So, as I did yesterday, I woke up at 5:00 a.m. today for some oatmeal and then went back to sleep. I will continue fasting today and go to my friend's apartment this evening. She has invited her fiance and two or three other friends - one other besides myself is not a Muslim. I'm going to be bringing dessert, and I'm going to make mocha truffle brownies with caramel sauce. All I can think of is: How am I going to bake those without tasting them and licking the bowl? Haha :)
Actually, a second thought I'm having is: I'm going to get so much done today because I won't be spending time cooking and eating! To do list: Laundry, cleaning, reading...
So, as I did yesterday, I woke up at 5:00 a.m. today for some oatmeal and then went back to sleep. I will continue fasting today and go to my friend's apartment this evening. She has invited her fiance and two or three other friends - one other besides myself is not a Muslim. I'm going to be bringing dessert, and I'm going to make mocha truffle brownies with caramel sauce. All I can think of is: How am I going to bake those without tasting them and licking the bowl? Haha :)
Actually, a second thought I'm having is: I'm going to get so much done today because I won't be spending time cooking and eating! To do list: Laundry, cleaning, reading...
Breaking the fast
After work today, I came home, took off my pink-striped hijab, and changed into pajamas. I took a nap, and it was wonderful. My stomach had been hurting, I had had a headache, and I was tired. When I woke up two hours later, I changed into a bright blue scarf - a gift from my best friend from when she went to Israel. (Thanks, Chris!) I also put on a tunic-style shirt over my jeans so that I wouldn't need to worry about my back showing during prayer at the mosque. Unfortunately, I pinned my scarf a little too tightly and it bothered me the entire evening. During the day, I had not had this problem...
When my friend and I got to the mosque around 8:30, we entered a cafeteria-like room crowded with women and children, and we found seats at a table in the back. (The men were in an adjacent room.) There were napkins, cups, spoons, and jugs of water on each table... and in the center of each table was a plate of dates. They were mesmerizing. Prayers were being piped in through speakers on the wall, and as soon as those were through, we all took a date and ate it slowly. I'd never eaten a date before, and it was glorious. Apparently dates contain a very high amount of potassium, which helps with hydration.
(Ramadan is celebrated to reflect the time when the prophet Muhammad received the words of the Quran, and he ate dates and drank water to break his fast. Today, the fast is broken each night in this way.)
After this small nourishment, the sunset prayers were done as a group in the main rooms of the mosque. There were so many people there. So many. The men pray on the first floor, in a huge room in which one person at the front with a microphone leads the prayers. The women and children are on the second floor, which overlooks the men's area on the first floor. Both areas are carpeted in a certain pattern that designates individual spots for prayer. Basically, the carpet patterns are shoulder-width apart in even lines that allow enough room for prostration.
The actual prayer is led in Arabic, and consists of a series of motions. Standing with arms against the stomach, bending at the waist, standing again, prostrating, kneeling, prostrating, standing, and repeating this different numbers of times based on the time of day.
After the sunset prayer was the feast. We returned to the dining area where we had eaten the dates, and we were served plates heaped with lamb meat, roasted chicken, rice, different sauces and stews, nan, salad... so delicious. I kept thinking that someone had made all of this food, but hadn't even been able to try it. I was lucky to be busy in an office all day and not thinking about food... but being in a kitchen with all those delicious smells?
After this meal, there was about an hour to kill before the next prayer time, so my friend and I went... to McDonald's for coffee. We knew it was ridiculous, but we had some great conversation, and she explained to me a lot more about what was happening at the mosque.
And finally, back at the mosque, we did more group prayers. My friend had explained that these would be a little different than the normal ones that I had just finally learned. The leader of the prayers would read the Quran in Arabic throughout, and the idea is to read the entire book over the course of the 30 days. This usually goes on for over 3 hours per evening of Ramadan, but we only stayed for the first hour or so. This time, the rooms were even more crowded. We prayed in an overflow room with lots of women and children.
I mentioned the speakers on the walls of the rooms; every room and area in the mosque has these speakers so that everyone can hear not only the calls to prayer, but also be involved in whatever is happening at the mosque at any time. So even in our overflow room, we felt very connected to what was happening in the main area.
The atmosphere the entire evening was mixed. Everyone was hungry and tired. Hungry and tired mothers struggled to control their hungry and tired children, who were constantly shrieking. When the food was being served, some people were rude or demanding. But at the same time, there was an overwhelming attitude of celebration, gratefulness, and that of wanting to help others. Ramadan is a time when every good deed done by a Muslim during that month will be magnified in the afterlife. It's like a race or contest to do the most good things with the best attitude possible in your heart.
I learned a lot about myself through this experience. It also solidified in my mind some of the values that I stand for and why, including modesty. I actually appreciate that men and women are so separate at the mosque. I never once thought about how I looked or appeared. The focus was only on attitude, and that was wonderful.
When my friend and I got to the mosque around 8:30, we entered a cafeteria-like room crowded with women and children, and we found seats at a table in the back. (The men were in an adjacent room.) There were napkins, cups, spoons, and jugs of water on each table... and in the center of each table was a plate of dates. They were mesmerizing. Prayers were being piped in through speakers on the wall, and as soon as those were through, we all took a date and ate it slowly. I'd never eaten a date before, and it was glorious. Apparently dates contain a very high amount of potassium, which helps with hydration.
(Ramadan is celebrated to reflect the time when the prophet Muhammad received the words of the Quran, and he ate dates and drank water to break his fast. Today, the fast is broken each night in this way.)
After this small nourishment, the sunset prayers were done as a group in the main rooms of the mosque. There were so many people there. So many. The men pray on the first floor, in a huge room in which one person at the front with a microphone leads the prayers. The women and children are on the second floor, which overlooks the men's area on the first floor. Both areas are carpeted in a certain pattern that designates individual spots for prayer. Basically, the carpet patterns are shoulder-width apart in even lines that allow enough room for prostration.
The actual prayer is led in Arabic, and consists of a series of motions. Standing with arms against the stomach, bending at the waist, standing again, prostrating, kneeling, prostrating, standing, and repeating this different numbers of times based on the time of day.
After the sunset prayer was the feast. We returned to the dining area where we had eaten the dates, and we were served plates heaped with lamb meat, roasted chicken, rice, different sauces and stews, nan, salad... so delicious. I kept thinking that someone had made all of this food, but hadn't even been able to try it. I was lucky to be busy in an office all day and not thinking about food... but being in a kitchen with all those delicious smells?
After this meal, there was about an hour to kill before the next prayer time, so my friend and I went... to McDonald's for coffee. We knew it was ridiculous, but we had some great conversation, and she explained to me a lot more about what was happening at the mosque.
And finally, back at the mosque, we did more group prayers. My friend had explained that these would be a little different than the normal ones that I had just finally learned. The leader of the prayers would read the Quran in Arabic throughout, and the idea is to read the entire book over the course of the 30 days. This usually goes on for over 3 hours per evening of Ramadan, but we only stayed for the first hour or so. This time, the rooms were even more crowded. We prayed in an overflow room with lots of women and children.
I mentioned the speakers on the walls of the rooms; every room and area in the mosque has these speakers so that everyone can hear not only the calls to prayer, but also be involved in whatever is happening at the mosque at any time. So even in our overflow room, we felt very connected to what was happening in the main area.
The atmosphere the entire evening was mixed. Everyone was hungry and tired. Hungry and tired mothers struggled to control their hungry and tired children, who were constantly shrieking. When the food was being served, some people were rude or demanding. But at the same time, there was an overwhelming attitude of celebration, gratefulness, and that of wanting to help others. Ramadan is a time when every good deed done by a Muslim during that month will be magnified in the afterlife. It's like a race or contest to do the most good things with the best attitude possible in your heart.
I learned a lot about myself through this experience. It also solidified in my mind some of the values that I stand for and why, including modesty. I actually appreciate that men and women are so separate at the mosque. I never once thought about how I looked or appeared. The focus was only on attitude, and that was wonderful.
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