Mid-day update

This morning felt a little unreal because of all the waking, then sleeping, then waking, etc. Fasting and wearing hijab have been uneventful. I think my level of self control and discipline on a daily basis are extremely high, so the most difficult part of my experience so far has been keeping focus on why I'm doing this.

I don't really care what people think of me or how they perceive me. Other than my coworkers, I haven't come into contact with anyone else I know. There have just been some double-takes in the hallway, like the maintenance guy I always say hello to.

The point isn't to look different or to stand out, but rather to learn and to help me focus on what should be important to me. And let me tell you how wonderful it is to walk down the street and know that people are not judging me based on appearance. Let's be real - whenever you see a person, you automatically put them in a category: good-looking or not. Today, I feel like people are looking at me and saying, "She's probably a nice person." Which creates its own problem in my mind, because I don't know if they're right. But at least they aren't checking me out.

I'm trying to be a nice person. It's something that I honestly have not been too concerned with lately. Living alone and pursuing a career can make you selfish... but at the same time, I guess I'm the only one who truly sees it. Look at how much I'm learning already today.

Tonight I'm going to the mosque, and I will definitely be writing about the following: the atmosphere, what food we break the fast with (I have no idea what it will be), and reflection on the day.

Do you have any questions or thoughts? Please share.