Vanilla Cream Cake

I made an amazing vanilla cream cake this week (if I do say so myself!). I got the recipe from the Penzeys Spice catalog, and I can't find just the recipe online, so this link is to download the summer catalog. The recipe is on pages 58 and 59. I never post recipes, right, but this one is just so good!


I made this! And you can, too.

Just some of my own notes on the recipe: The amount of melted butter truly is correct (only 2 tablespoons), but when you pour it into the milk, make sure the milk isn't cold or the butter will clump up. Also, I put (homemade) black raspberry jam in the middle layer. Lastly, the frosting wasn't quite enough for a four-layer cake, so try making a bit more. You can barely tell mine was a four-layer because the frosting is so thin in between.

Crocs Contest

Awesome news. Remember that post earlier this month about how I entered in the Crocs Ambassador Contest and I asked for you to vote for me? Well, the voting period has concluded, and

...drumroll, please...

I am a finalist in the contest and I am going on a free trip to Boulder, Colorado next week. Can you believe it?



And now that the news is out, I owe a huge, huge "thank you" to every single person who voted for me. Everyone reading this, take this personally. I mean it.

Awkward Transition

As you can probably relate, transitioning from a serious topic (death and rape in Kyrgyzstan) to more uplifting or everyday topics is a bit of a challenge in a blog. It's hard to juxtapose posts like that and seem like a sane human being.

So to maybe convince you that I am not coldblooded and hardhearted, this post is like buffer between bad news and good news.

Thank you for your time.

An Uzbek's View on Kyrgyz Violence

I emailed my Uzbek friend Rustam, who is living in Lanzhou, to check up on my Kyrgyz friends in light of the violence in the south of their country. I have many Kyrgyz friends who I met through Lanzhou University, some of whom are still in Lanzhou and some who have gone home. One Kyrgyz couple who I was especially good friends with is in a unique situation: the husband is still in Lanzhou while his wife went back home to her family to give birth to their child. Naturally, I have been worried about these friends and their families. And, thankfully, I heard back that everyone is safe and well.

While my main purpose was to ask about the well-being of my friends, I also asked Rustam about his take on the violence and about why he thinks the attacks are occurring. I told him some reasons I have heard in the international media, including economic problems being blamed on the Uzbeks, the corrupt government egging on the violence, the fear of Uzbekistan encroaching on Kyrgyzstan, and gang violence based on ethnic hatred. Here is part of his email (awkwardly translated from Chinese):

"Caitlin, I think that all the reasons you listed are in fact causes of the conflict [economy, corrupt government, fear of Uzbekistan encroaching on Kyrgyzstan, and gangs] except for the one about Uzbekistan wanting Kyrgyzstan's land. Over there in Kyrgyzstan, I think there is one significant force between the Uzbeks and Kyrgyz that is provoking the violence: From what the Kyrgyz are saying, the Uzbeks are being beaten to death and a ton of women are being raped. The Uzbeks are verifying all of this. There is also another large factor, and that is that the people who are dying are innocent. It's just like a huge, awful game, and in this game the ones who suffer are the pawns, just like in chess."

The image of a game of chess is powerful. The pawns, the little innocent guys, are being slaughtered for the sake of the major players like the knights, rooks, kings, and queens, who perhaps represent the government, and are just out to win their battles at others' expense. We can only hope for a quick checkmate.

China and Korean Conflict

When world news is not focused on vuvuzelas, talk is all about tension between North and South Korea, and speculations about China's likely involvement are usually included. I would like to add my own.

I don't think China has any interest in helping North Korea with anything. Just because both are labeled as Communist countries does not mean that they have much in common. China did not even want to get involved in the Korean War in the '50s, and the country's apathetic feelings have probably become more so. Involvement in the Korean War, for China, was more about working against Western influence than it was about fighting for North Korea or even for supporting Communism elsewhere in the world. The countries are not all buddy-buddy like many people believe. References to long-standing good relations between China and North Korea are really a pet peeve of mine.

And with North Korea not being seen as a major threat, I doubt China would want to pull all the weight and destroy relations with the rest of the world. Just not going to happen. So don't hold your breath. But I do hope the United States responds with swift action if fighting breaks out. We think we can save the world, which is why everyone hates us, so we had better deliver when the opportunity arises.

Tell It Like It Is

In this news story about China sending aircraft to bring its citizens in Kyrgyzstan back to China, a Uighur man tells it like it is: "This is the first time I thank our motherland [China]." Oh, snap.

Also, China has sent 20 tons of aid (food, water, tents) to Kyrgyzstan, but I would like to point out that it came from Xinjiang, the autonomous region in northwest China which is populated mostly by the Uighur minority. Maybe it was funded by the national government and came from Xinjiang because this region is closest to Kyrgyzstan, but who knows.

In other related news, the benevolent United States of America is taking a very small, late, and indecisive step toward helping out in Kyrgyzstan by sending an "envoy" to "assess the situation." Here's the situation: people in Central Asia are dying. If and when US aid happens, that aid had better not go only to the Kyrgyz. The United States must help out the ethnic Uzbeks who are being uprooted from their homes and families and are fleeing into Uzbekistan.

Thoughts on Kyrgyz Violence

The violence in Kyrgyzstan is depressing, discouraging, and worrisome to me. I am constantly checking the news and searching for more pictures and video. It just hurts me so much to think about my Central Asian friends and their families, their languages and cultures and customs and rituals... to think about them in this context of violence.

The countries of Central Asia each have their own distinct culture, history, and language. After gaining independence from the Soviet Union around 1990, Kazakhstan, Uzbekistan, Kyrgyzstan, Turkmenistan, and Tajikistan have had minor clashes. Ethnic problems are at the top of the list since people of each country's ethnic group live in the other countries- like the ethnic Uzbeks living in Kyrgyzstan who are being killed every day. With no explanation. Sure, Uzbekistan is a double-landlocked country with an overflowing population, but it's implausible for them to want to or try to take over Kyrgyzstan. I feel like these countries should be in this together. After suffering under the Soviets, they all became free and in control of their own livelihoods. They should be celebrating.

I clearly remember, right after the international festival at Lanzhou University last fall, my friends told me about when they were young children and their families were poor. Their parents worked tirelessly, and it was for nothing (well, it was for Russia). After they became free, life was so much better and happier. The countries celebrated their uniqueness and nationalism was encouraged.

But maybe it is backfiring now, all that nationalism. It reminds me of my post from December of 2009 about the fight in my dorm building. There is such a fine line there between respect and pride.

And, to conclude this jumbled post, on days like today I take a step back and look at how much my life has changed. I used to get upset and riled up about completely normal things. And now my heart pounds as I read news about Kyrgyzstan, and I have no one to discuss it with. I cry when I hear about Uzbeks' houses being burnt and women and children fleeing to the border, and there is no one there to share the pain I feel. Wouldn't my life be a lot simpler if I had never gone to China and met wonderful people who taught me about all these cultures? It's times like these that for fleeting moments I wish I was "normal" and didn't have these painful burdens from what I have learned and grown to care about. I got into a debate in class once about learning- that it's not always a good thing, that learning can be detrimental. My classmates thought I was off my rocker, and, you know what, I am.

Man sizni sevaman.

VOTE FOR ME!

I'm on my way to winning a trip to Boulder, Colorado, $2,500, and lots of prizes. I just need you to vote for me every day!

I entered a photo contest last month with Crocs shoes - I just submitted a photo of myself wearing the shoes and added a caption and a little blurb about why I want to win the contest. And they picked my entry and 14 others for people to vote on. Out of the 15 semifinalists, 10 of us will get to go to Colorado! So my chances are good.

But it all depends on YOU because I need the votes! You can vote once every 24 hours through facebook and through the Crocs website (or both, shh, don't tell!). If you go to the website link, click on the orange contest banner on the far right and navigate to my entry to vote.

Thank you!

The Smell of Burning Coal

Check out this video about "the dirtiest city in the world." The images in the video from Linfen, China are so familiar to me and remind me most of my two trips to Fugu, China to stay with a friend and her family.

The gray skies, the trash everywhere, the cars... what sticks with me most, though, is the smell of burning coal. As I watched that video sitting in my living room, I had one of those strange experiences where I smelled burning coal as if I were in my friend's home in Fugu by their furnace. And that isn't the first time that has happened to me. When I first returned home from China, sometimes I would wake up in my dorm room and completely forget where I was. And then I would smell burning coal. I wasn't actually smelling it, of course, but I was remembering the entire experience of waking up in a strange world- one of pollution and gray skies and trash and cars- and smelling burning coal.

And yet, the people of Linfen- and Fugu and Lanzhou and the thousands of other polluted cities in China and around the world, still lead happy and normal lives.